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White House Denies Setting Fire

From Karl's cubicle.

Washington - White House spokesman, Scott McClellan, held a press conference this morning to deny rumors from Democrats that the budget proposed by President Bush would be responsible for cuts in funding Fire Houses for Fire Fighters.

 

Assuming that the confusion may have been another misstep of words by President Bush, McClellan announced: "What the President meant to say was 'house fires,' as in 'we shouldn't be funding house fires,' not with the words turned around as is being reported, I think — some are saying he said, 'we shouldn't be funding Fire houses.'"

The press immediately seized on this and fired back with questions about what fires we could expect to be funded. One reporter from The White House Pool wanted to know if the President's mention of ethanol in his State of the Union address allowed for the inclusion of other gases such as methanol and green house gases. McClellan answered that to the best of his knowledge, the budget would not contribute to Global Warming by funding fires of green house gases.

Senate Democratic leader Harry Reid was still pretty steamed today about the budget cuts, stating: "When you have a real bad chafe ... it's hard to get soothed."

Some Republican political pundits are speculating that Senator Reid was "no doubt referring to his alleged use of the budget as toilet paper."

Sen. Rick Santorum of Pennsylvania, a member of the Republican Senate leadership, said Senate Republicans want to work with Democrats and have deliberately tried to avoid provoking them. "You can make all of the laws that they want about smoking in the toilet, but at the end of a whole day of B.S. accumulation, that was just the spark that set them off."

Karl writes from his cubicle where green house gases occur while he smokes on the inside.

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