From Karl's Cubicle
Local nudist, Johnny Ivey, may have the worst case of contagious
eczema known to man, but that is not what he's getting so much
attention about lately.
Johnny Ivey is claiming that: the United States is "in the grip
of a grim Dark Meat Chicken Conspiracy that threatens to segregate
poultry as we know it."
"It's not that I'm trying to ruffle anybody's feathers," said
Ivey, "it's just that dark meat chicken is going the way of chicken
scratch!"
"When was the last time that you went into a McDonald's or
Wendy's or Taco Bell, and was able to find any dark meat chicken?"
asked Johnny.
"Why I would just like to be able to once go into Chick-Fil-A and
order an 8-pack of dark meat nuggets. Last time I checked, the
nuggets came from the dark side of the chicken anyways!"
Fast-food aficionados may be beginning to take note of Johnny
Ivey, but for now, it is still very much a grass roots rash
campaign. Perhaps it's because Americans have an obsession with
eating breasts. Or, the real cause may be deeper and more sinister
than we can guess; as certain prominent gas station restroom
graffiti bears witness: "White Chicken Rules!"
Maybe Johnny Ivey should stop worrying about his chicken races
and start worrying more about his cock fighting.
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