Funny Junk You Didn't Know

Pizza Oven Sales Rising Fast

According to an unidentifiable Indonian, Samni Sambal Ulek, "With all of the flour that the United Nations is giving us, which is not self-rising flour, it just makes good cents to make pizza! we will be swimming in the dough!"

Pizza ovens are even out-selling the Boss Wave Radio.
 

Although pizza is not traditional Indonesian cuisine, they are finding that the baked-in-the-crust concept carries a lot of merit.

Already, floatation devices, are being baked right in the crust, along with more traditional Indonesian staples: fish, coconut and chile.

"This is a sink or swim opportunity for us," stressed Samni Sambal Ulek, who was spending most of today dog-paddling with his dog: Cassia. "Don't worry for Cassia," he said, "his bark is worse than his bite."

Many Indonesians are now struggling to get in on the ground floor of the pizza business, following other successful pizza ventures, such as Bali's Fat Yogi's Indonesian Cajun Pizza and Papa Ron's Pizza.

Indonesian-based Italian restaurant chain Papa Ron's Pizza will go international next year with the opening of three outlets in Singapore, China and the United Arab Emirates, a company executive said on Monday.

"Many excellent oceanside locations have recently been vacated by the former owners," continued Samni, "and when it comes to pizza, it is whatever floats your boat!"

"It is like extra pedas pizza sauce; you gotta drop it like it's hot!"

At the going rate of Rp18,000 per slice (about 50 cents in euros), for every foreign relief aid worker, it is easy to see how lucrative the pizza business could be in parts of Indonesia.

It is estimated that Indonesians spent an average of Rp 10 billion ($1.1 million) every month for pizza sold by six major restaurant chains in the country, last year.

Samni expects to have a large delivery business due to the many inlets and convenience of the many floating cars that are on hand.

"I am thinking that I will call my business, 'Sambal's Casa Luna Pie Dementia,' and I will offer a special of buy one pizza at regular price, and get another topless pizza for only Rp 50,000."

"Choose from my specialty pizzas: 'Wet-Dream Aishwarya Rai Supreme, (formerly known as 'Soggy Top')' or the deep-dish 'Deep-Impact Nasih Putih,' or 'Tsunami Sea-Food Lovers' that features shellfish right on the crust. It beats black eyed peas!"

Samni intends to keep a large amount of crust on hand in case of earthquakes.

Samni's dream may prove to be very profitable if one can judge from an exchange overheard just outside Arrivals in the Bantam Center Ferry Terminal:

Back-packer: "Hey look, they got pizza !!!"

Back-packer: "Two slices please?"

Papa Ron's Best: "Chicken of Beef, Sir?"

Back-packer: "We'll have beef, please."

Papa Ron's Best: "Sorry, we only have shellfish, right now."
 

Karl writes in his cubicle and dreams of surfing Indonesian websites in search of Bali dancers.