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Señor Pat Robertson Preaches on the Hugo @ss of Chavez
By Steve On The Road in Miami
MIAMI, FLORIDA - I'm U.S. Navy retired with 22 years, but I may be recalled
to duty to take out Hugo Chavez, if televangelist Pat Robertson
continues to preach for special forces against the Venezuelan dictator.
So I when I heard that Chavez was in Cuba, I went to Miami, the capital,
to get an interview.
 Venezuelan President Victor Chavez has run to Cuba fearing that Pat
Robertson might carry out his call to have him assassinated. "Nothing
has gone right since Senior Robertson put out a hit contract on me with
the 700 Assassins" says Chavez. "Senior Pat Robertson is trying to kill
me!"
Cuban Emperor, Fidel Castro, seemed quite surprised that Chavez would
seek refuge from Bay of pig Pat invasion in Cuba, which is so strongly
aligned with the Christian Coalition and the Vatican.
"However, we as good Christians must try to mitigate these matters as
best as we may," asserted Castro.
Meanwhile, Pat Robertson corrected his earlier remarks stressing that:
"I didn't say 'assassination.' I said our special forces should 'take
him out.' 'Take him out' could be a number of things including dinner at
Phat Ho's Korean Pizza or Sushi. Dinner and a movie, and buy him some
Bazooka gum. When I said special forces, I really meant 'special.'"
 But Fidel cautioned Hugo, that "the televangelist Robertson could not be
trusted, and was only after your monthly contributions to his political
and religious radio and TV shows."
Fidel Castro has offered to protect Chavez by letting him stay "in the
safest place in all of Cuba."
 "You, my comrade Hugo, deserve the best 24 hour protection available in
this world. The 700 Club can't compare to 'Club Med Experience' that
awaits you in Cuba!" bragged the supreme Marxist of the revolutionary
junta.
Later, Fidel instructed his personal assistant to "make arrangements for
Chavez in the safest, most secure place in Cuba; but do not tell him
that it is the detainee repository at Guantanamo Bay."
"I'd rather see him dressed up as Christmas tree than to have to face
that pig Pat Robertson's wrath. I never sent in my pledge" lamented
Castro.
Then Castro stood silently by as Chavez, the ruler of the Citgo
convenience empire, held a conference for the Miami press.
 “Calling for the assassination of a head of state is a terrorist act,”
said Chavez. “We could even request his extradition,” he added.
"if the U.S. government fails to cooperate, I will consider bringing the
issue to United Nations."
"People, like me," asserted Chavez. "I have gas!"
As Chavez was being escorted away, he could be heard asking the security
personnel about Robertson's membership in the American Rifle
Association.
Well they tell it for the truth at the King of Beans restaurant in
Miami. You can thank me later.
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